I love being back here in Seattle.. it feels like home. All my senses are heightened and I'm truly in my element! Coming from Arizona after a long year I'm finally at rest. Washington reminds me of my native land Wisconsin, well the elements do such as rain, grass, clouds, seasons... For the first time in my life I'm having flash backs of my childhood.. remembering smells, places, memories, faces, buildings, colors, vacations, textures, feelings.. and it's all instant, unplanned and beautiful. I think for many this happens or has happened all the time but for me it's new and I love it!
I'm staying in a 1950's brick bungalow... I love brick! And the 50's for that matter or anything that reminds me of my grandparents. Often when I get home from work as I put the key into the slot I see my grandmothers red ruby twist sliver jewel key ring and remember how I had just gone to the bank with her, or the time I was swinging my purse around like a helicopter in the store, or eating big macs, crispy pizza, scrambled eggs with plenty of salt, milk with coffee (she started me young), her telling me to eat my crust it will make my hair curly... in that vintage green kitchen with pale yellow paint. The snacks of hard old fashioned candy, the metal grass green box attached to the wall that kept the tin foil and yes Sam the milk man who lived down the alley who always brought me chocolate milk from his deliveries. And then there was the alley where we rode the green monster three wheels with my two brothers while catching fire flys.. of course they taught me how to smash them so I could see the ground glow a bit but we won't admit I killed them. ;) Then there was the basement filled of endless toys, antiques, bikes, records that my Grandfather collected driving down the alleys of Chicago rummaging for great finds and he did find many.
I remember I got an eclectic blue swin bicycle with a bell of course. I think Mr. Diamond gave it to him the neighbor down the alley who was always sweet. It feels like I spent most of my weekends as a little girl in the city with my grandparents. My Grandfather was always up at the crack of dawn although retired singing "When the saints go marching in", his name was Charles. He was was always teaching me songs of yesteryear. And my grandmother Blanche who said prayers with me every night, "Now I lay me down to sleep". The pink panther washcloth, Marry Poppins, cheetos, Hi Ho Cherry O games, the flapper dresses I tried on, the mirror in the hallway that became my spinning place when my Grandpa told me what a beautiful ballerina I was and in that same mirror I got ready in several years later to attend his funeral.
It's been as if something was blocking my heart connected to my memory for so long. It's quite the odd experience and it's not like I didn't remember before (some things I didn't). But when triggered by a smell or sight it's a whole new experience and I remember at a deeper level that brings newer details, it's fun. It's nice to remember.. I'll try to write them down when they happen and make a list of flash backs to remember today again and tomorrow.
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